Indian giving

My neighbour accused me of Indian giving.  This was because of my habit of inserting pot plants which I had managed to bring to the point of death in amongst her flourishing collection until such time as they had recovered at which point I took them back.

We both paused to wonder what Indian giving meant.  Which Indians? Did they also have the habit of dropping things off and then repossessing them? It turns out that it is a reference to North American Indian culture in which a gift was expected to be reciprocated with a gift in return of equal value.  It was a form of ceremonial wealth-sharing which was not regarded favourably by the Europeans. If this tradition of gift-giving broke down then the original gift might be taken back and this would signify the breakdown of social relations. In American English the term came to be a slur.  It features in children’s language because it is not uncommon at that age for gifts to be made and then reclaimed by the giver who regrets the previous rush of generosity.

My neighbour decided that Indian giving was not relevant to our situation.  She likened herself to a foster pot mother who took a deprived pot child, dealt with the yellowing leaves, drooping stance and general lack of the will to live,  and nurtured it back to health only to have the ‘real’ mother turn up and snatch it away.